The 5 Jugular Reasons to Ask for Referrals

Date: October 15, 2007
Word count: 1155
Reading time: 3-4 minutes
Benefits of Taking Action: If you ever hold back from asking when you know you've brought value, read on!

One of the reasons I got into the referral business was the experience of going to endless networking events, asking other business owners and sales people how they got their business, and almost always hearing them say: "word of mouth". Then I would see the same people:
1. Not ask for referrals
2. Not know how to ask and get results, and
3. Do a poor job of educating their referral sources and clients a) who an ideal or a specific client was and b) how to talk about them to generate more referrals (other than a few raving fans and blind luck).

And yet, while getting recommended is so important, most sales people do not get referrals consistently. Why don't they ask? I covered this and how to overcome it in my Sept 18, 2007 e-zine (please email me for a copy if you missed it).

If you need more reasons why you should be asking, here are a few of the 'basics':
You will make more money
You will do more business with people you like because they will be recommended by people who like you
This means your work will be more enjoyable
You can spend more time educating and less time selling because a good referral already comes somewhat pre-sold on you
You will spend less time and a lot less money on marketing yourself and leads programs
Less time or no time on cold calls
You will face less rejection.

Think about that for a minute. You deal with people who want to meet you - what a concept! And yet, while that is a glowing list, none of these are the most important reasons.

Here's why you should be asking for and getting more referrals:
1. You're good at what you do AND you'll make your clients and referral sources look good too.
Provided you are bringing good value to your clients, you are that 9/10 movie that people will recommend. If you are good at what you do, then do not play small. Asserting how you can help others and making them more successful is your duty.

You have to believe it. Last week I wrote about Harry Beckwith's new book, You, Inc. In it he comments: "To an astonishing degree, you are what you believe and others perceive you that way, too." This is a confidence in yourself and eye contact issue.

Secondly, how did you feel when a good friend thanked you for referring him or her to a great retirement planner, electrician, hotel, museum exhibit, travel website, or CPA? Well, that's how you make your clients feel when they recommend you: really good!! You are boosting their credibility and their relationship with the person they refer you to. Why would you want them to go the Yellow Pages? Nothing is more compelling than a personal recommendation.

Ask yourself: Do I believe in myself or not?

2. Everyone put on this planet wants to make a difference.
If you believe in what you are doing and you are there to serve and educate not simply sell, you currently have that opportunity. You may or may not have a personal mission statement, but I have never seen one that didn't have an intrinsic piece that said: "I want to make a difference in the world." When you help more people by getting more referred to you, you can be that difference-maker.

Ask yourself: how much am I helping others? Am I asking clients what value they are getting?

3. So you fulfill your potential.
Ask yourself: am I fulfilling my potential?
Are you close?
The more time you take to learn, the more you become a resource for others. The more referrals you get, the more people you help. The more people you help, the more you develop your skills and develop your strengths. The more you challenge yourself and step our of your comfort zone, the more you discover what you are truly capable of. According to Dennis Waitley, 80% of people are unwilling to do this. Why would you want to be one of the sheep? Do that in your next lifetime if you must.

Ask yourself: how many more people could I help if I asked consistently for referrals? What's my first step to address this?

4. So you can look yourself in the mirror at the end of the day and say; "Yes, (insert your name here), I did my best today and I gave others the chance to help as many people as they care about (by recommending me)."
In other words, you are seeking more opportunities to serve others whatever hat you are wearing. You are being a better resource for everyone you know, you are asking more people what you can do for them, and you are more consistently having referral conversations.

You will achieve much more in your life if you repeat the words: "I am responsible for all the results in my life" more often each day. "I am responsible." I know if I did it, I would go out on many more dates! But I digress.

Ask yourself: on a scale of 1-10, how much responsibility do I take for my life in all areas? With getting referrals? (If you ever blame anyone or anything else, you are not at a 10!)

5. So you can fulfill your life's purpose.
Ask yourself: What am I passionate about? When do I feel most fulfilled?

What you value most can vary enormously. But regardless of whether your vocation, your family, your church or charity is your passion, if you get more referrals and help more people, two things will happen. To paraphrase Harry Beckwith:

One day you will make more money. Every day you will feel more fulfilled.

Last week a Realtor client of mine shared with me that she had met a top producing peer of hers who also attends her church. This woman had shared that real estate was something she enjoyed but that it was not her driving passion. What motivated her to continue excelling at selling high-end homes was the extra money she could devote to the causes that were close to her heart.

Ask yourself: What drives me? Where is my passion?

At the very end of Beckwith's book, he almost apologizes for the "me me me" emphasis of his title: You, Inc - The Art of Selling Yourself. He concedes that it makes the focus appear to be: "What can I get?" His response?
"Perhaps, if there is only one answer, it's this: Just give, then watch."

That's the approach your clients want, your family wants, your community and your favorite causes want. You deserve to stand tall. Don't live with regrets and underachieve. Our culture needs more role models. And most likely so does your company and maybe your family. Go forth and ask! If you believe in your value, you have nothing to lose.

Be a resource. Who else do you think might get value from reading this? Please forward this on.